Today’s events

1. Received a call early this morning from Muscat, Oman for a potential job offer. The person at the other end sounded very English. I am not opposed to exploring opportunities. He plans to wait till I get back from Tokyo.
2. The newfound niece (“bhagin”) called me from Minneapolis-St. Paul airport. She was returning to India by KLM. It was a sad moment. I found her to be very smart with a very broad outlook and a very compassionate heart. She hopes to return. I wish there were more people like her.
3. I put in about two days worth work in about six hours in the office. I think I had a list of about 20 to-dos and I somehow managed to check off all before going on vacation.
4. I got home early to take Tigger to the vets for boarding. He cried all the way. He should know that it’s only temporary and we will never abandon him. It was hard for me. I think he will have a nice vacation too; a thorough check up, a bath, clipping paw nails (Manicure?), food and rest. However, it’s still not “home”.
5. Talked to the older daughter in San Francisco. San Francisco has been unusually hot. Global Warming!! The Masurs (whom we are supposed to meet in Tokyo on June 30) have already arrived in Japan, she said.
6. I almost finished packing and printed out the boarding passes for tomorrow’s flight. My wife and I are all set. We take off tomorrow towards the “Land of the rising sun” and to the “Forbidden City”.
7. I will not be posting for the next two weeks. Standby for my future posting.

I need a break

I am tired and I need a break. Since last Monday, it has been a roller coaster ride with highs and lows. The project I had planned on finishing past week didn’t happen. Forrest Gump is right. “Shit Happens”. I was trying to entertain my brother and sister-in-law in between my busy schedule by taking them here and there after work. However, there too, unpleasant things happened. This morning they left. I hugged them both at the airport and asked them to forget the incident. The niece (“bhagin”) who showed up in my life is going back to India on Tuesday. My wife and I are supposed to leave for Tokyo on Wednesday to see our younger daughter and we have not started packing yet. I have to be at work next couple of days.

If you call it a silver lining, I had some of that. Last night we had some guests and friends of my brother for dinner. My wife cooked all day. The food was great. Afterwards, we had a music session. I think it made up for earlier unpleasantness. I got introduced to one Mrs. Hoffman of Minnesota (via email and through my “bhagin”) who apparently has a big heart and has adopted a few children. She wants a copy of my “Color of Life”. I plan to mail her a copy.

In any case, I am still tired. I am looking forward to my trip to Tokyo and Beijing. At least for a few days I do not have to think of office work (I won’t have my lap top and cell phone with me).

I will be also away from Iraq war news (50000+ Iraqis and 2500+ US soldiers who did not have to die). Who am I to judge Bush or anybody else? Perhaps somebody higher up is watching and will make the final judgment for an uncalled for war.

A great week, a great Father’s Day

Today is Father’s day. (A little history: In 1909 , Spokane, Washington, Sonora Smart Dodd was listening to a Mother's Day sermon. The lecture inspired her to have a special day dedicated to her father, William Jackson Smart, who had brought her up and her siblings single-handedly after their mother died. She could realize the greatness of her father and wanted to let him know how deeply she was touched by his sacrifices, courage, selflessness and love. She held the first Father's Day celebration on 19th of June 1910, on the birthday of her father. The idea soon caught on and in 1924, President Calvin Coolidge supported the idea of a national Father's Day on the petition sent to him by Dodd on the acceptance of fatherhood. In 1926, a National Father's Day Committee was formed in New York City.

However, it was thirty years later that a Joint Resolution of Congress gave recognition to Father's Day. Another 16 years passed before President Richard Nixon established the third Sunday of June as a permanent national observance day of Father's Day in 1972 in the honor of all good fathers that contribute as much to the family as a mother, in their own ways. Even before Dodd came into the picture, Dr. Robert Webb of West Virginia is believed to have conducted the first Father's Day service in 1908 at the Central Church of Fairmont. However, it was the colossal efforts of Dodd, the devoted daughter of the Civil War veteran who refused to remarry for the sake of his six children and took upon himself all the duties, love and care of a mother, that eventually led it to a national observance.)

I got up at 6:00 AM as usual. Everyone else was still asleep. Trying not to disturb anyone, I sat in the back porch. Sipping a cup of hot, black tea I watched the heavy down pour on the golf course behind. The silhouette of trees through that sheet of rain looked like a forest through mist with lots of promise. A song came to my mind (“Snehe Aamar Sata Srabanor dhaaraasaare bristir plaaban aane …”). I started humming the song. Then the rain stopped. A deer ran through the golf course, as if she was trying to show me how fast she could run, or perhaps she came out to wish me a “Happy Father’s Day”.

I looked back. It has been a great week with a great ending. Last Monday our older daughter left for San Francisco. She called me this morning to wish me Happy Father’s day. She also stated that there was something in the mail from her and her sister. Last night our younger daughter from Tokyo wished me a Happy Father’s day as we “skyped”. It was Sunday in Tokyo already. Last Tuesday, my newfound niece (“bhagin”) left for Minneapolis. Today she surprised me with an electronic greetings that said,

Sending Father's Day greetings to someone who taught me things a father would teach his little girl...

Happy Father's Day!
May we have a wonderful relationship always - may I continue your good work, your thoughts... and learn from your life...

From someone who is like your daughter.

Last Wednesday my brother and sister-in-law arrived from India arrived from their daughter’s place in San Francisco. We have been busy ever since.

In between phone rang constantly from the inspectors overseeing my ongoing project on an offshore platform. The project wasn’t going well. However, we were overcoming hurdles slowly, but surely. Should I say the glass isn’t half empty, rather filling up although slower than expected?

A friend of my brother from their school days’ in India (who lives in Houston) invited all of us for dinner on Friday. Yesterday we all went out to dinner at a Mexican Restaurant. This morning after the Deer ran before my eyes I too decided to ride my bike through the wet streets of the neighborhood. I did this with my new niece only last Tuesday morning.

After a late breakfast, my brother and I decided to barbecue. It’s Father’s day and we wanted to do something special. Besides, he loves barbecue. Then our older daughter’s friend Corina Stoicescu called. She is like another daughter. Therefore, we invited Corina, her boy friend Brian, and Corina’s parents. They came. Corina even brought a present for father’s day (an REI water bottle that can be strapped around the waist, another addition to my running gear). Our cooking was a rush job. However, I think everyone enjoyed it. It ended with my spice tea as requested by Corina’s dad and Brian. I suppose they still remembered my tea.

We then watched a home video (converted from an old VHS tape) from 1985. Yes, time has left its mark. Our little daughters are no longer what they looked 21 years ago. The niece (“bhagin”) who was born many years after I had left India and whom I had never seen before is a young woman. The other niece at San Francisco is a new mom.

Life goes on. As William Purkey said, “Live like it’s heaven on earth”. I feel so blessed.

If you believe in miracle

I have heard of parents reuniting with their long lost children after many decades. I even heard of siblings separated by turn of events meeting for the first time in their autumn. Some call these miracles. I had not experienced anything like that until now. The stranger who called me out of the blue and introduced herself as my niece came to see me past weekend. I did not know what to expect. Certainly there was this unseen bond, call it connection through our genes, call it chemistry. It was a miraculous experience for both of us. She showed love, respect, and a gentle sweetness that won the heart of this uncle (mama).

On Sunday, I took her to Galveston beach. Seating on a pier we watched people fishing, surfing, or simply sun bathing. She took millions of pictures of sea gulls, surfers, and someone’s dog and above all of two of us. We talked endlessly. We had lunch at a restaurant by the sea. We stopped at downtown Houston and walked by the Buffalo Bayou. I think she had a wonderful time. Monday I had to go to work as I had an important meeting. So did my wife. I felt bad leaving her home alone. When I got home I took her to the nearby mall to buy her a gift. Then we watched “Fantasia”. Later we talked a lot about our loved ones, talked about the past that never goes away, and so on. It was pretty late when we said good night to each other. I took Tuesday off to show her around before she had to return to Minneapolis. We went to the museum at Hermann Park and watched an Imax movie called “Ocean Oasis”. Then we visited the butterfly museum. Then we picked up some hamburgers and had a mini picnic at a park by the Lake Houston. The time was running out. We were both sad having to part soon. She never imagined that it would be so memorable.

I saw her off finally at the airport. From opposite sides of security we exchanged flying kisses. I came back to an empty house reminiscing the sweet experience of the past few days. She called my cell phone to let me know her flight was half hour late, which she said she could have spent with me. Then finally she sent a text message as her plane was taking off. I was so happy to meet her and sad to see her go. Only a miracle could build such a bond between two strangers. We are no longer strangers.

The empty nest seems full again

Our older daughter arrived home last night for her 10th high school reunion. Yes, time flies. We picked her up from the airport. I think she thoroughly enjoyed her mother’s cooking. We went to bed relatively late.

This morning, the stranger i.e. my niece whom I had never met, arrived. I picked her from the airport. It was a sweet reunion of an unknown uncle and his niece for the 1st time ever. I saw sparkle in her eyes. She was hoping to surprise me coming from behind. We hugged and hugged. I cannot express the feeling. She told me about what her Bengali friend had mentioned (a story called "Agantook" by a famous writer where an older lady finds and reunites with her niece I believe). I hope I did not ruin her childhood imagination. I am an ordinary man, and not her imaginary childhood hero to whom she used to write imaginary letters. It’s not an imagination anymore. I am not sure which is better, imagination or reality. Yes, we are real in flesh and blood.

Once she got home, I think she quickly took to our older daughter and my wife, her newfound cousin and aunt. Then we “skyped” with our other daughter in Tokyo and discussed our upcoming vacation with her in Tokyo and Beijing. It was past midnight in Tokyo. The house did not seem empty for a change. Even Tigger, the cat got lots caress from everyone. We had a breakfast with “Luchi and Aloo Bhaaji”, (Assamese style fried fluffy tortilla and fried potatoes) my wife’s specialty. I even made my trade mark spiced tea that our daughter loves. There was music playing. For a change I did not think about work or house hold chores.

Yes, a house is not a home without love, affection, noise, food, etc. It will come to an end in a couple of days. I don’t want to think about that right now. Savor the day. In the evening our daughter goes to her high school reunion party and we go to a graduation party with our new niece. I feel so blessed. Life is for living.

A busy week, a memorable encounter

Last Sunday my brother visiting from India left for San Francisco to his daughter’s place. I saw him off at the airport. It’s funny, how things have changed for two people in their mid-life. We never hugged each other growing up in India. I used to be his able assistant carrying pebbles for his catapult. He is a retired professor now and I am dreaming of retirement soon. We hugged each other at the airport as we waved good-bye.

On Memorial Day, instead of usual barbeque (hard to barbeque for two), my wife and I spent a little money at the mall to keep the US economy going.

From Tuesday through Friday, I was sleeping on a bunk bed on an offshore platform in the Gulf of Mexico. Our days started at 5:00 AM. The sky was always overcast (it even rained cats and dogs for a few hours one day to torment me with the fear of a rain out day on my project schedule) and I never got to see the beautiful sunrise or sunset on the blue ocean that I had hoped for as in the past. On the positive side, the work progressed like clockwork. Those amazing workers (riggers, welders, crane operator, and others) do amazing things out of monstrous steel pipes and fittings. They worked 14 hours a day. Robert, the cook, fed us well (eggs, sausage, shrimp etouffe, chicken fried steak, biscuit, gravy, …). I had no way of working off that extra diet. Then again, I love good food. Who doesn’t?

A helicopter brought me back to shore on Friday. Then I drove home. My wife was still at work. I turned on my computer expecting a bunch of junk emails. Among that junk emails I had one of the sweetest surprise; an email from a stranger I never met. This stranger was my niece from India currently on an assignment in Minneapolis. Her email was full of emotions showing a desire to meet this unknown uncle she had heard stories about. She was born many years after I had left that country. We exchanged emails and pictures. On Saturday for the 1st time in our lives we talked as strangers, but connected somehow through that unseen bond.

She is coming to visit her uncle coming Saturday. Our older daughter asked me if I was nervous. Perhaps. I am not sure how to welcome a family member I have never met before.

A beautiful bridge

Life is full of surprises; some are sweet and others not so sweet. If we can get over the bad stuff, sweetness of other stuff makes it a heaven on earth.

I had a surprise email from a girl in Seattle (who had introduced herself as my niece from the place I had left behind more than three decades ago) about a year ago. She was born after I had left for USA. Therefore, I had no clue about her, nor did she about me other than lots of stories from her mom. Her mom is my close cousin whom I had seen only a couple of times. The last time when I saw her, she was perhaps younger than this girl sending an email to an unknown uncle. Anyway, I had replied. I received no response. She appeared like a comet to remind me of my own long journey from my past and then she disappeared again. It was a sweet surprise that was not meant to last.

A year later, she is here again. Her hiatus was on purpose as she told me. Several unpleasant incidents happened in her life including cancer to her dear little sister. However, she never forgot me, nor did I. She is here in the US again temporarily on business. She is coming to see me. We exchanged pictures. She is a pretty, young woman of our older daughter’s age. I am not what she had imagined me from the black and white picture she had been holding onto since her childhood.

I did not want a bridge between the present and the past. She is now the beautiful bridge that I am longing to see. I have no grudge with the past. Life goes on and it must go on happily without hurting anyone. After all we are all connected through our genes.